


I'm Wide Awake (And So Alive)

by Crazy_dreamer95



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Barista Lexa, F/F, just another coffee shop AU, nursing student Clarke, rated for language, that almond milk imagine your OTP which has been circulating FB recently
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 20:07:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6871522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crazy_dreamer95/pseuds/Crazy_dreamer95
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You’re a godsend” Clarke sighed, bringing the cup to her lips.<br/>“The coffee isn’t that good Clarke.”</p>
<p>OR</p>
<p>Clarke settles for lactose free milk because her favourite coffee shop doesn't stock almond milk. Until one day, Lexa gives her exactly what she asked for, a flat white with almond milk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Wide Awake (And So Alive)

The winter wind was howling, the chill running down Clarke’s spine as she all but ran to the closest coffee shop, her coat pulled tight across her chest. She pushed the doors open and all but sighed at the immediate warmth that engulfed her.

_Grounders Grind_ was a small coffee shop near the apartment Clarke had recently moved into after leaving home to study. She held her book close to her chest as she shuffled up to the counter, smiling at her regular barista.

“Hello Lexa” she greeted the girl standing behind the counter “how’s it going?”

Lexa looked up and gave Clarke a small smile “it could be worse. How’s uni going? Finished that essay you were complaining about last week?”

“Yep handed it in one hour before the due time” she answered, seeming pleased with herself. “I’ll just get my usual today – flat white with almond milk.”

Clarke dropped a handful of coins into Lexa’s palm before she answered “and as always we don’t have almond milk, just lactose free.”

“You know me too well” Clarke commented, giving Lexa a small wave before she sat down at her usual table in the corner. From this vantage point she could see the people working behind the counter, everybody in the shop, and the people outside the window. It was where Clarke found most of her inspiration for writing or drawing. It also happened to be the best light corner, making it perfect for reading.

She dropped her book on the table and flipped it open to the page she left off. With uni taking up the majority of her time, Clarke had come to appreciate her few minutes of quiet time.

“Here you go” Lexa said as she placed the mug down onto the table before wiping her hands on her stained apron.

“You’re a godsend” Clarke sighed, bringing the cup to her lips.

“The coffee isn’t that good Clarke” Lexa scoffed, already heading back to the counter.

\----

“I don’t want to hear it Finn!”

Clarke was yelling into her phone again.

This was a regular occurrence.

“No Finn” Clarke groaned and lowered her voice, noticing the stares from other patrons “I don’t care! That’s not my problem – yeah well maybe you should’ve thought about that before you went and slept around.”

Lexa watched Clarke in her peripheral vision, taking in how angry she looked. She was gripping the edge of the table, her knuckles going white, and Lexa could see how hard she was tensing her jaw.

But then something changed.

Clarke dipped her head and talked quietly into the phone, and Lexa noticed her eyes being to sparkle with unshed tears. Her shoulders shook slightly as she seemed to take in a deep breath before continuing her conversation.

“Goodbye Finn” Clarke hung up and placed the phone down on the table, raising her head slowly. Lexa didn’t have time to look away before their eyes met. Clarke bit her lip gently and shrugged her shoulders while wiping the tears from her cheeks. “Boys hey?” she joked, trying to hide just how much the conversation had hurt her.

Lexa nodded and walked to Clarke’s table to take her empty mug. “I wouldn’t know” she said, mentally cursing herself at the comment.

“Pardon?” Clarke asked, tilting her head slightly in confusion.

“Boys” Lexa repeated Clarke’s earlier statement “I wouldn’t know.”

“Oh” Clarke smiled and turned her body more to face Lexa. “Girls, hey?”

Lexa smiled and turned around before looking over her shoulder to respond to Clarke – “Yeah, girls.”

\----

Clarke walked into _Grounders Grind_ with a younger looking brunette one day. They stepped inside and immediately the small shop was filled with the sound of laughter and a feeling of joy. The two approached the counter and greeted Lexa with matching smiles.

“Hey Lexa” Clarke said, a light blush tinging her cheeks when the other girl elbowed her in the ribs. “I’ll just get a flat white with almond milk, and my annoying friend Octavia will have a skinny cap, please.”

“No worries” Lexa took the money from Clarke’s hand and nodded to Octavia “I can’t say I’ve seen you around before.”

“I just moved here and live next door to Clarke” Octavia answered “best neighbour I’ve ever had in my life.”

“I would imagine so” Lexa commented “if you two wanted to sit I can bring your drinks to you? It’s not like we’re busy.”

The two thanked Lexa and walked towards a table. If the shop was any louder, she would’ve missed Octavia’s comment.

“She’s hotter than you let on! Damn Clarke, no wonder you come here all the time.”

\----

It was a quiet, wet morning when Clarke heard Lexa swear for the first time.

“You fucking bastard!” She groaned under her breath, her curse followed by a loud clang of metal being dropped on the floor.

Clarke looked up from her textbook and saw Lexa holding her red hot hand in the air and rushing to the sink. Clarke placed her book on the table and went walking up to the counter.

“You ok?” She asked, trying to see how bad Lexa’s hand was.

“Yeah, fine, just a burn” Lexa answered through gritted teeth “nothing I haven’t had before.”

“Want me to look at it? I am a nursing student.”

“I don’t need your help Clarke.”

Clarke couldn’t help but jump back a bit at the tight tone in Lexa’s voice. “Sorry” she apologised “I was just trying to help.”

Lexa’s shoulders dropped and she turned her head to face Clarke, “I know” Lexa conceded “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to snap. I appreciate your offer, but I’m ok.”

When Lexa leaves that day, her hand beginning to swell, Clarke knows that she’s not ok.

She doesn’t turn up to work for three weeks.

\----

When Lexa finally comes back, Clarke almost reaches across the counter to hug her.

“You’re back!” She exclaims “how are you?”

“I can move my hand now so that’s nice” Lexa replies nonchalantly “but the scarring is restricting my range of movement – it’s definitely the worst burn I’ve sustained in the line of work.”

“My mum knows a great plastic surgeon who might be able to help” Clarke comments, fishing around in her bag for a pen and paper. She scrawls down her phone number and hands the paper to Lexa “this is my number, just send me a text if you’re interested in seeing the surgeon, and I’ll get the details from mum.”

For a moment Lexa’s hand hovers over the paper, part of her too proud to reach out and accept the help offered to her. However, it was Clarke who made the decision for her, reaching over the counter to boldly slip the piece of paper into her breast pocket.

“Even if you just think about it” she says, before she takes her coffee and leaves Lexa blushing behind the counter.

\----

Lexa never texts Clarke about the surgeon, and Clarke never asks.

\----

One night just before closing, Clarke comes walking in wearing a pair of tracksuit pants that look two sizes too small and an old stained Madonna shirt. Her hair is wild and barely contained in what used to be a tight, neat ponytail. Her eyes look empty and sunken, a complete contrast to the usual brightness Lexa is used to seeing.

“Coffee?” Lexa asks, already making Clarke’s usual.

The only response she gets is a small nod.

“Rough day?” She probes, looking up to meet Clarke’s eyes.

Her shoulders slumped and she tilted her head from side to side, wincing at the pull in her neck. “I lost my first patient today”, Clarke admitted, her tone laced with sadness and utter exhaustion.

“I’m sorry” Lexa said, walking around the counter while carrying Clarke’s coffee. “I think you need to sit down for a bit.” Gently, she placed her hand between Clarke’s shoulder blades, noticing her slight flinch at the contact, and guided her to one of the seats.

The café was completely empty and the two girls sat in complete silence. Clarke brought the mug to her lips and took in each sip as if it were liquid gold. Their silence was only interrupted by the grumbling of Clarke’s stomach. Wordlessly, Lexa stood and walked behind the counter, fishing underneath the bench until she found her bag she stashed under there. She pulled out a bag of chips and took them back to the table, placing the food in front of Clarke.

“Thanks” Clarke said quietly, placing her mug down to open the bag.

Lexa knew that Clarke was on her nursing placement the moment she didn’t show up for her regular Tuesday 10am coffee. Instead she showed up at 6am right at opening, or 1pm during the lunch rush. Each time she came in wearing the same uniform – navy blue pencil skirt (which Clarke had demonstrated to be very practical, jumping into a lunge position and climbing onto a chair to show how it did not restrict her range of movement), with a white ‘Polis University’ button up shirt tucked in. She proudly displayed her badge across her chest – CLARKE GRIFFIN Nursing Student.

“He was palliative” Clarke whispered, her eyes squeezed shut. “He was palliative and I expected it and was prepared but – I don’t know. His family couldn’t make it in time and I saw-” she paused and took in a shuddering breath, tears beginning to form again “I saw the life leave him. I was with him when he died and I was so honoured to be there during his final moments, but it’s still hard to deal with.”

Lexa didn’t know what to do. She didn’t know much about Clarke. Only that she was a nursing student, her mum was a doctor, her ex-boyfriend Flynn wouldn’t stop pestering her, she liked writing and drawing in her spare time, her favourite book was Restless by William Boyd (she had a crush on Hayley Atwell), and that she enjoyed a warm blueberry muffin when she was stressed. Her favourite singer is Nicki Minaj, and she moved from Australia to the US when she was eight (she still has a little bit of an accent on certain words). Admittedly, Lexa knew quite a lot about Clarke. More than she was willing to express.

“I don’t know what to say Clarke” she opted to say, instead of offering fake assurances of understanding. “I can only imagine what you must be experiencing, and I don’t believe that my words can bring comfort to you.”

Clarke sniffled and brought her hand up to her cheek to wipe away the tears which were sliding slowly down her face. “You just being here helps.”

“Ok” Lexa said. She stood and walked to the door, flipping the ‘open’ sign to ‘closed’, and took off her dirty apron before sitting back down. “Do you want to talk about your day?”

“Well. It was shit. Literally.” Clarke chuckled and gestured to her clothes “this is my ‘emergency outfit’ that I keep in my car for days like today.”

Lexa leant back in her chair and clasped her hands in her lap, relaxing for the first time that day as she listened to Clarke recount her experiences.

\----

Lexa didn’t see Clarke until two weeks later. When she came in she was wearing a pair of worn looking pyjamas and had her hair thrown into a messy bun.

“Finally finished placement?” Lexa asked as she approached the counter, a grin immediately spreading on Clarke’s face.

“Yesssssssssssss” she drawled out, all but slamming her hands onto the counter in excitement. “Do you know how relieved I am? I can sleep in. I don’t need to worry about working unpaid. I don’t need to worry about people’s lives. I can just worry about me. It’s great. I’m doing nothing today. You hear that Lexa? Nothing. I’m in my favourite pyjamas and I am going to spend the whole day in front of the TV catching up on Wentworth and I’m so fucking excited.”

Lexa laughed and shook her head at Clarke’s antics. “Well, I hope that this coffee puts you off to a good start.”

Clarke reached across and took the take-away cup from Lexa’s outstretched hand, immediately revelling in the warmth it brought.

“I’m sure it will!” She said, raising the cup in thanks before she walked out the door, leaving Lexa to let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

Less than a minute later, Clarke was back in the café, holding the cup in the air with a confused look on her face.

“Is this my usual?” She asked, looking at Lexa curiously.

“Uhhhhhh yeah?” Lexa said, putting down the tea towel she was holding “flat white with almond milk.”

“Exactly” Clarke walked up to the counter, whispering sorry to a customer she almost knocked into on the way. “Almond milk. This is almond milk.”

“Yes. What’s your point?”

“You guys don’t have almond milk.”

“That’s correct.”

“So why is this almond milk then?”

“I – I” Lexa stuttered, her face going red and heart rate increasing with anxiety. Had she overstepped? “Well. I bought it.”

“You bought it?” Clarke repeated in question, smiling when Lexa nodded in response. “Just for me?”

“Yes Clarke” Lexa answered, suddenly aware of how quiet the café had gone “for you.”

Clarke leant over the counter and lowered her voice so only Lexa could hear her. “Text me later? So we can talk? If you want to that is, I don’t want you to feel like-”

“Yeah” Lexa interrupted her, noticing that she was beginning to ramble “yea, I’ll text you later, that will be nice.”

“Alrighty then” Clarke leant back and rocked on the balls of her feet, clenching her fists to resist the urge to clap with excitement. “I’ll talk to you later than.”

As Clarke left the store, Lexa felt her heart rate slow down, although the smile didn’t leave her face the entire day.

\----

Her phone beeped from the other side of the couch, and Clarke all but lunged to reach it.

**_Unknown Number:_ ** _Hello. It’s Lexa from Grounders Grind. I was wondering if you wold be interested in going out for coffee sometime?_

Clarke grinned and held her phone close to her chest, trying to contain the emotions threatening to burst from her. As she typed out her response, she couldn’t help but think that all of this happiness and comfort, the laughter and friendship, started over coffee and would become something more (hopefully) with the help of coffee.

**_Clarke Griffin:_ ** _Hey Lexa :D I would love to – so long as we go somewhere that has almond milk ;)_

**Author's Note:**

> Hey all, thanks for reading my short one shot. If you want to leave a comment please do - they will help me get through my major assignment that I need to write! Love you all.
> 
> Also I just noticed I have a habit of picking story titles from songs, whoops, now I cant' stop.


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